Just Because

I feel angry and resentful. Just because someone else is disorganised, or self-focussed, or manipulative, or demanding, does not mean that I am required to acquiesce to them. My plans do not have to change just because someone else is put out. Just because someone else is frustrated, or childish, or knows how to lay out a passive-aggressive guilt trip, does not mean I have to feel sad, or controlled, or infuriated. I am responsible only for me, I cannot and do not control other people’s happiness. Just because someone else might lash out, or wheedle, or presume, does not mean that it’s my fault, or that I need to ‘be nice’ just to keep them ‘happy’. Sometimes conflict is helpful in the long-term.

But words are easy.



  1. ladywillow said,

    September 29, 2008 at 2:58 am

    You’re right about what you have written in your blog…when I read that I thought how absolutely true those words ring…and yet somehow people still dance rings around others who seem to think we need to adapt to their moods/ideas/opinions etc….well I used to do that…but have learnt that I too am entitled to my opinions and should not have to always be pleasing or be liked …and as you so succinctly said “…but words are easy”…life is all about balance and compromise…but not when you have to bend and scrape to keep it…*btw …I like your idea about “Best and Worst” part about your day…think I’ll use it from time to time on my own blog site*…nice to read you by the way…Willow

  2. notperfection said,

    September 29, 2008 at 4:18 pm

    Thank you for your kind words.

    It’s a continual dance, isn’t it? Shuffling around each other, trying not to have two left feet, or step on too many toes, but, at the same time, to enjoy dancing, and not worry too much. I’m getting increasingly better at the balance, but it’s still so hard when other people around me expect me to dance a certain way – ballroom, say – when I might just wanna salsa 🙂

    As to the ‘Best and Worst’, I figured that, even if all my words ran out, (which they regularly do) I could, at least, keep track of the best and worst things. So, even if I find I can contribute nothing to the blogging world long-term, I’ll still be able to look back on some kind of record of how things were going. *smile*

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